Starting Over: Our Life After Active Duty

In all honesty I have no idea where to start, so I’ll start from the beginning. When I met my husband he was already an active duty soldier going through Advance Individual Training (AIT), at Fort Sam Houston, Texas. We were together for less than a year when he deployed the first time. During that first deployment I was pregnant with our son. The Army way of life became all I knew. Within a year of getting home from his second deployment, we had our second child. I had followed him from Georgia to Colorado to the state of Washington; I gave up everything to be with my husband and father of my children. The only wife I knew how to be was to an Active Duty Soldier. Within 6 months of our daughter being born, I was asked to talk to my husband’s therapist to learn their plan of action for him and the steps they wanted my help with.  Because his drinking had dramatically increased he was labeled an alcoholic, and he had been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

When I went in there, I was expecting to hear what they were going to do until his contract with the Army was up, which was in about 4 years. What I didn’t expect was to be told that they had started his Med-board and we should find out within 6 months to a year what the decision was.  When I married my soldier, I lost my identity and became a soldier’s wife; that was what I knew and that was what I was. I was blindsided and didn’t know what to do. For us it went so fast I was expecting to transition fairly slowly, because that’s the Army way “hurry up and wait.” I figured I would have time to adjust but within a day of finding out he was going through the process, he was getting appointments and knocking things off the list for his evaluations. I had two children under the age of 4 and another I babysat who was 1-year old so I wasn’t allowed- yes I said allowed- to go to his appointments or information briefs. When he would get home, I would ask him what was said and for the most part he would have no idea because his memory was so bad from the PTSD.

I received no helpful information on how to make the transition easier for him much less myself. When we hit his six-month mark of when it was started we were loaded up, papers signed, and heading home. I was in shock; I thought I had more time. When we got home we had to live with my parents until we were financially able to move to our own place. That in itself was bad, but when you add two children and a veteran with PTSD in the mix, I about lost my mind. While we waited on the decision from the Veterans Affairs (VA), I went back to work. I realized within 6 months that there was no way I was going to be able to work again. When I came home I found my two children were up playing by themselves while their dad was asleep because of his medication; he couldn’t remember if he took his medications; so he would take them multiple times. I knew in my heart that if I didn’t quit my job either my children were going to be hurt or my veteran was. I was not prepared for this, but I was an Army wife; we take what we get and make the best of our situations.

When we were around other people in the military they understood our struggles because they were going through them as well, but here in Tuscaloosa, Alabama, people had no idea. People would ask me why my young and able-bodied husband wasn’t working to support his family and I would have to explain about him having physical and mental disabilities that stopped that from happening. You wouldn’t believe some of the comments I got. I couldn’t help but wonder what my life had become. How had I gone from being a wife who knew who and what I was to someone I had no idea what it even meant to be a civilian wife. I had lost everything and anything of myself in that first year. I became someone I didn’t recognize. I had to stay strong for my kids and I had to stay strong for my veteran who didn’t know how to relate to the real world. I lost my voice in the mist of all that was going on in life. Two years ago on Labor Day weekend 2012, I took a step in finding the person that I had lost 10 years ago when I met my husband. I found out about group called “Her War, Her Voice” and a group called “Courage Beyond”; I sent them my biography.

I was asked if I would like to come on a retreat and meet other women who are like me. I was scared and unsure; I had never left my kids or husband for that long because they all needed me. I decided that in order for me to help them I had to help myself, which wasn’t an easy thing for me.  Several times I had talked myself out of going.

That weekend changed my life. I found that voice and that person I had lost all those years ago. It might not have been loud in the beginning but it was the seed I needed to start my journey. I was able to advocate for my veteran better after that weekend and I was able to better advocate for myself. I realized what I was missing all those years; I realized at age 30 what I wanted to be. I enrolled at The University of Alabama and got accepted. I am going to school now to be a social worker because that was what I have been in my heart all those years. I found that I am not alone and many people have that feeling of being lost. I wasn’t the only one who lost my identity when the Army wasn’t “the active” in our life. I might not be an Army wife anymore but I am not a civilian wife either. I am a Veteran’s Wife and no matter what will happen in the future that will never change who I am on the inside.

Transitioning was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life and the process needs to include the spouse as well as the service member. Not only are the service members losing who they were but their spouses are, too. Not only are the service members losing who they were but their spouses are, too. That old saying “If the Army wanted you to have a wife, they would have issued you one” doesn’t apply any more. They need to see that spouses give up their way of life in order to be there for their service members, so when it comes to big things they need help along the way as well.

#DeployedHome is an effort created by Bama At Work to help share the stories of returning veterans and how they have made it through their struggles. This campaign is part of the Service Member to Civilian Summit’s effort to bring together service members, veterans, their families, and community stakeholders to meet with advocates, researchers, clinicians, educators, and policymakers from around the nation, They want  to better understand and explore ways that all stakeholders can improve the transition from military service to civilian life.Through the use of #DeployedHome we hope that many of these veterans will see how their fellow soldiers have made it through and can see that they aren’t alone in this battle. If you are interested in participating, you can also submit your transition stories on our website militarytransition.ua.edu .

We invite veterans to tell us their story using #DeployedHome on Facebook and/or Twitter. We want to let our veterans know they are not alone, and there is still hope for them to overcome any challenge they may be facing.

Article by Crystal Ransom, social work student at The University of Alabama, member of the Service Member to Civilian summit planning committee, and wife of an Army veteran. Her husband was an Army medic deployed in Iraq in 2004 and 2006.

Being Deployed Home : The last Mission.

What do I do now? It’s probably the most important question service members ask themselves when they are deployed home. The transition from uniformed duty to civilian status is not just a change of jobs. It’s the start of what could be the hardest mission: going home. According to a nationwide poll of veterans conducted by The Washington Post and Kaiser Family Foundation, more than half of veterans returning home from Iraq and Afghanistan said their adjustment to civilian life was difficult. They cited various reasons, from struggles in finding a good job to inadequate assistance from the government.

#DeployedHome is an effort created by Bama At Work to help share the stories of returning veterans and how they have made it through their struggles. This campaign is part of the Service Member to Civilian Summit’s effort to bring together service members, veterans, their families, and community stakeholders to meet with advocates, researchers, clinicians, educators, and policymakers from around the nation, They want  to better understand and explore ways that all stakeholders can improve the transition from military service to civilian life.

Veterans who have survived Al Qaeda, roadside bombs, land mines and death of their fellow soldiers are now struggling to put their lives back together. In the 13 years since American troops first deployed to Afghanistan and Iraq, more than 2.6 million veterans have returned to a country that was not fully prepared to meet their needs.

Through the use of #DeployedHome we hope that many of these veterans will see how their fellow soldiers have made it through and can see that they aren’t alone in this battle. If you are interested in participating, you can also submit your transition stories on our website militarytransition.ua.edu .

We invite veterans to tell us their story using #DeployedHome on Facebook and/or Twitter. We want to let our veterans know they are not alone, and there is still hope for them to overcome any challenge they may be facing.

Article by Leroy Hurt and Kevin Lake. Leroy is the Associate Dean for the Professional Development and Community Engagement at The University of Alabama.He is also a retired U.S. Army officer. Kevin is the Communications Specialist for The University of Alabama College of Continuing Studies.

   

Understanding Military Culture

Military culture is based on the unique tradition, mission, structure and leadership of military history. Further, military culture maintains distinct sub-cultures (known as Branches of Service) that have unwritten sets of rules, viewpoints, perspectives and operating procedures. Understanding military culture is important when working with Veterans.

Defining the uniqueness of military culture:

The military is unlike any other career and the demands of military life create a unique set of pressures on service members and their families.  For most people, their job is what they do; it does not so deeply define who they are. For families, military life offers a sense of community with clearly defined rules and expectations. Members of the military and their families share a unique bond, professional ethic, ethos, and value system. The military offers a sense of community and camaraderie unlike any other profession. But it also fosters a warrior ethos that rewards physical and emotional prowess and frowns upon weakness and timidity. It is said that the military defends the Constitution; it does not emulate it. There are strict rules limiting freedom of speech and association.  To maintain “good order and discipline” commanders at all levels are given widespread authority over the personal affairs of their subordinates and held personally responsible to resolve any issues that could potentially affect performance of duty.

A Veteran’s military experience has equipped him or her with a unique set of values and skills. These characteristics distinguish Veterans from their civilian counterparts and can make them valuable members of your team. Below are common traits associated with those who have served in the military.

• Highly structured and authoritarian way of life with a mission-focused, goal-oriented approach—both explicit and implied.

• Strict sense of discipline, tending to adhere to rules and regulations.

• Strong work ethic with high regard for physical and mental strength.

• Code of conduct and organizational culture that reflects well-defined and strongly supported moral and ethical principles.

• Decisive leadership that expects loyalty of subordinates and allies.

• Warrior Culture – Bravery, Duty, Honor and Courage.

• Loyal to Comrades- Leave no Man Behind!

• Protective of family and civilians, chivalrous.

• The Mission comes first above all else.

• All Volunteer Service (No Draft).

Additionally Military Service Members share the following traits:

• Quick Learners. Men and women in the military are often forced to learn new tasks very quickly under high pressure. This can result in the development of an accelerated learning curve, which means less time training.

• Tolerant. Veterans understand diversity. During military service, they were required to work with and for whomever happened to be serving with them. This experience gives Veterans a greater sensitivity when it comes to cooperating with individuals from different backgrounds.

• Tenacious. Veterans have experience performing their duties in less-than-perfect situations. This means they have most likely achieved success under adverse conditions. Having already overcome adversity during their military career can make Veterans great employees because they are less likely to give up when challenges arise.

• Understand Leadership. Veterans have witnessed the dynamics of leadership in action and understand how to manage people in order to achieve results, regardless of circumstance. In addition, Veterans have a healthy respect and understanding for leadership, whether they were a leader or a follower during military service.

• Team Players. Although there are significant differences between the command and control culture of the military and the more collaborative culture in the civilian workforce, Veterans bear a huge sense of responsibility toward their colleagues. This trait makes Veteran candidates natural team players.

• Efficient. Veterans have likely performed effectively under high pressure on numerous occasions during their military career. The ability to handle pressure translates into workplace efficiency as military personnel are used to getting a job done correctly, quickly and expediently—with limited resources or assistance.

• Appreciate Receiving Feedback. Veterans are used to receiving direct feedback from superiors. Military personnel learn to absorb what they are told regarding their performance without taking it personally. As a result, Veterans know how to handle feedback well and appreciate being told how their performance aligns with expectations.

As a civilian who has not ever served in the military, it is easy to be influenced by commonly held stereotypes regarding military personnel and the challenges and experiences that they have faced during their service. The chart below highlights some of these issues and challenges.

What are some common stereotypes of military culture?	What are some of the challenges that come along with the commitment to military life?	What are some positive aspects of military life?
Too rigid and serious Unable to think outside the box Unwilling to learn a new culture Roadblock to higher education Training and jobs have little relation to the civilian world Life threat (combat and deployment)	Loss (e.g., death of close comrades or loss of relationships, loss of aspects of one’s self, loss of possessions) Inner conflict (belief systems or values) Strong stigma with receiving mental health care Family separations and re-assimilation into the family	Increased sense of camaraderie and teamwork Pride in serving the country Support for continuous education Insurance and retirement benefits

Each military service has its own history, mission, culture and terminology. Listed in the chart below is a brief description of each branch of the military. It is important to remember that each person is an individual, so ask the person how he or she would like to be addressed. The U.S. military has five branches: the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines, and Coast Guard. The Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines are housed under the Department of Defense (DoD). The DoD is headed by the Secretary of Defense, a civilian appointed by the President. Each department within the DoD is headed by its respective Secretary (e.g., the Secretary of the Army), also a civilian appointed by the President. Each branch is headed by a military 4-star general or admiral (i.e., Army Chief of Staff, Air Force Chief of Staff, Chief of Naval Operations, and Commandant of the Marine Corps) and these individuals are collectively known as the Joint Chiefs of Staff. The Coast Guard is housed under the Department of Homeland Security during peacetime and can serve as part of the Navy’s force during times of war. Each branch of the military has a Reserve component.  In addition, our nation is also served by the National Guard and the Merchant Marine.

Service Member to Civilian

Military Service Veterans transitioning to the civilian workforce may face challenges demonstrating how their military experience relates to the career opportunity they are seeking. However, as hiring managers and HR professionals, being aware of these issues can help you bridge this gap as you integrate talented Veterans into your organization.This conference ,dedicated to the process of transition ,will be held at the Bryant Conference Center on December 2-3, 2014. Follow us on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and visit our website for more info and news about veteran careers, veterans issues and the transition process.

Article by T. Scott Martin, MSW, LCSW. Scott Scott Martin is the Chief of Social Work Service for the Tuscaloosa VA Medical Center and is part of the advisory committee for the S2C Conference. He served as an Army enlisted Combat Engineer and was later commissioned as an Army Officer. He served as a Captain in the Army’s Medical Service Corps as a Social Work Officer until 2004

My Transition from Military to Civilian Through Yoga…

 “Coming home is harder than fighting in the war.”

– Congressman Patrick Murphy

Clay Hunt was a fighter in every sense of the word.  He fought for years, both literally and figuratively, before finally ending his life all alone in a Texas apartment.  He was educated, handsome, young, accomplished – it didn’t make sense at casual first glance.  A Marine, Clay came home from multiple combat deployments with raging symptoms of PTSD and survivor’s guilt.  He had lost friends and seen more than he ever wanted to. 

The clash between yoga and warrior cultures –

I will always be proud to have been a Marine, but after becoming a yoga teacher, I think about pride differently than I used to.  I used to think strength meant presenting an image of strong silence and always looking like I had everything together.  Yoga taught me about vulnerability, honesty, and connecting authentically with the people around me, letting them see both my light and dark.  We have to be honest about where we are hurting, or where we fell down.

I’ve fallen down pretty hard before and it took me too long to get back up because I didn’t know that people might be okay with an imperfect version of me.  Marines aren’t supposed to be sad.  Marines aren’t supposed to screw up.  I was.  I did.

What if I had completed training designed to increase self-awareness and promote resilience?  What if PTSD was something I knew to look for in myself and others rather than ridicule as the province of the malingerer?  Understanding warrior culture thoroughly only underscores the need for mindfulness training – it is all about stigma.  Right now we are losing more veterans to suicide than to combat.  I’m a pretty decisive person with a limited ability to ask for help and zero trouble taking risks – I was almost one of those statistics.

I teach yoga today because I know how it saved my life.

The suicide numbers among active duty military personnel eclipsed the number of combat deaths in 2011.  Before the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, the incidence of suicide in active duty US service members was consistently 25% lower than in civilians.

Yoga offers something special and completely reframes the issue of treatment.

The idiosyncratic messages of warrior subculture make sense to me.  I grew up in a military family where “civilian” was synonymous with a host of pejorative insults.  I joined the Marine Corps in college to test myself.  I doubted whether twenty-mile hikes or back-breaking obstacle courses were within the scope of things I could physically accomplish- I quickly learned that they were; they had to be.  In those early years as a Marine, I got very good at presenting a veneer of stoic professionalism at all times.  Presenting the certain, effective façade required some incredibly useful skills – skills that become incredibly destructive when you never learn how to turn them off.

The above description fits most Marines.  We tend to be a driven, dysfunctional lot.  I was a bit of a performance junkie and my desire to constantly display an ideal version of myself in front of others has caused incredible heartache and alienation.  I weathered deployment, loss, injury of loved ones, alcohol abuse, domestic violence, and divorce completely alone and in an unhealthy way.  I share this not because any of it is particularly interesting, but because it is particularly common and normal in the military community, I call home.

Why Yoga for veterans?

The answer has to lie outside the contemporary standard of care.  Yoga can do that.

I came across yoga as an athlete looking for something fun to try, something new to master, and something to help me bend my unyielding muscles a bit more easily.  What I found on the mat changed my life entirely.  I found a practice that was about more than my body, my training, and was something I could practice and study while joyously never “mastering.”

Our bodies were made to move in constant search of unity with our minds and spirits.  It is a natural stillness that those who have felt it love, pursue, and fight to regain if lost.  When we discuss the sorts of trauma and injuries our veterans have experienced, I believe we need to bring mindfulness into the conversation around treatment and prevention.  Pills and therapy are not enough to return this active, passionate community to full health after trauma.  We won’t seek them out and we won’t ask for help.

While clinical health services exist for soldiers and Marines with existing mental health conditions like post-traumatic stress, they are not stemming the rising tide of service suicides.  Framing mindfulness training as a way to “bulletproof your brain” renders the practices palatable within the confines of warrior culture.  Marines and soldiers are competitive individualists who respond much better to notions of challenge than to victim or patient identities.  I teach yoga because it asks the practitioner to work at creating mental fitness and resilience, and I know no other way to reach my peers with such effect.

Follow us on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and visit our website for more info and news about the transition process, veterans care and military personnel education.

Article by Dr. Kate Hendricks Thomas,  Assistant Professor of Health Promotion at Charleston Southern University and former Marine Corps Officer.  Kate serves as Co-Chair of the Community-Based Organizations track for the Service Member to Civilian Summit.

 

How to Help Veterans Transitioning To Civilian Life ?

“Military training does not result in a pleasant segue to the civilian world, and it can be difficult to forge a career change. A comprehensive transition program is necessary whether the separating veteran is looking for higher education or employment (American Council on Education, Veteran Success JAM 2010, p. 21).”

Researchers, policy makers and federal agencies have been slow in coming to terms with the realities of being in a worldwide conflict in multiple countries with no end in sight and the impact that has on service members, veterans and their families (Pryce, Pryce and Shackelford, 2012). In a recent article, J. R. Romaniuk (2012) stated:

“We must assume the challenge of returning veterans as our own. A social worker confronting an OIF/OEF veteran for the first time must recognize the history of the person he or she encounters. Listening to and understanding each individual’s history and matching it with our own professional training and what we know about how these young people live is vital to successful treatment” (pp. 2-3).”

Service Member to Civilian (S2C), a national summit to address the current and emerging needs of service members transitioning to civilian life, will be held at the Bryant Conference Center December 1-3, 2014. S2C will examine how service members from all branches of the military transition to civilian life and how we can improve that transition through translational science and service. This summit will bring together service members, veterans, their families, and community stakeholders to meet with advocates, researchers, clinicians, educators, and policy makers from around the nation to better understand and explore ways that all stakeholders can improve the transition from service to civilian life.

The scope of the need is great: between 2002 and 2012, nearly 1,500,000 veterans left active duty. Multiplied by the average three family members, the impact is enormous – in 2009, the 2,258,757 active duty personnel had 3,093,709 family members (Pryce, Pryce and Shackelford, 2012). There are approximately 22.7 million veterans nationwide, the highest percentage (40.4%) of whom lives in the South; over 400,000 veterans live in Alabama alone.

S2C is the first national, interdisciplinary summit to focus on translational research to better understand and improve the transition from military service to civilian life. S2C incorporates four themes – the roles of higher education, families and children, communities, and employers in the transition – interactively. These themes collectively reflect the objectives and aims of the summit to build a research consortium, present current research, develop multidisciplinary future researchers, use current research to illuminate critical issues, identify research needs relevant to demographic shifts in the Armed Forces, and build a cadre of new professionals inclusive of current graduate students, interns, and diverse researchers underrepresented in the academy

The S2C objectives are to:

• Present current research and best practices for improving military to civilian transitions.
• Build research and practice consortiums that bring service members, including National Guard and Reservists, veterans, and their families together with researchers, Department of Defense (DoD) and Veterans Affairs (VA) clinicians and decision makers, civilian employers, researchers, students, and higher education leaders.
• Articulate short-term and long-term translational agendas for research and practice in four core theme areas.
• Provide job acquisition training and access to employment opportunities.

The video below will be presented as an introduction for our speaker panel, in September:

 

 

Follow us on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and visit our website for more info and news about veteran careers, Service Members to Civilian process and military personnel education.

Article by Dr. Karl Hamner,  Assistant Dean for the UA Capstone College of Nursing and the School of Social Work overseeing research and is Co-Chair of the Service Member to Civilian Summit.